The Role of Women in Global Peace - TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Practice Test

In the TOEFL iBT^® exam, the writing test assesses a candidate's ability to write academically, where they are required to successfully integrate the knowledge into their work and organize the ideas coherently. The two Writing Sections, such as Academic Discussion and Integrated Writing, make up the Writing Section.

In this practice test on 'The Role of Women in Global Peace', you will hear a lecture on a certain subject from a professor in the Academic Discussion activity. After that, you'll take part in a conversation where you'll have to voice your opinion and provide solid justification for it

The best method to get ready for this part of the test is to practice on tests specifically made for the Academic Discussion format. Let's start your study with our "The Role of Women in Global Peace"-themed TOEFL Academic Discussion practice exam.

Writing Instructions:

• You will read a discussion related to an academic topic in class where your classmates have written their opinions on the said topic.
• You have 10 minutes to prepare and write your personal opinion on the academic topic. 
• Try to answer the question based on the discussion. You can also take ideas from the opinions posted by your classmates.
• There is no maximum word limit. However, an effective response should be a minimum of 100 words.
• Your response will be judged on the quality and clarity of your writing with well-supported reasons.

Instruction: Your professor is teaching a class on international relations. Write a post responding to the professor’s question. In your response, you should

1. express and support your personal opinion
2. make a contribution to the discussion in your own words.

An effective response will contain at least 100 words. You have ten minutes to write.

Professor: In our upcoming class, we will explore the role of women in supporting global peace. Some argue that women bring unique views and skills to peacebuilding efforts, while others believe that gender does not significantly influence peace results. Do you think women play an important role in achieving global peace? Why or why not?

Ruby: I think women play an important role in achieving global peace. Women often bring different views. They focus on community and making peace. For example, in Liberia, women-led movements helped end the civil war. Their focus on talking and non-violence can lead to lasting peace agreements. Involving women in peace steps ensures that everyone's needs are considered. This leads to full and lasting answers.

Harry: Although I agree that women can help in peacebuilding, I don't think their role is more important than that of men. Peace results depend on many factors. These include political will, a steady economy, and international support. For example, the peace process in Northern Ireland involved both men and women, and it was the group effort that led to success. Gender alone does not determine the success of peace efforts. Instead, it is the teamwork and dedication of everyone involved that make a difference.

Before delving into sample responses, let us examine the parameters of a strong TOEFL score!

Sample Response for the Academic Discussion Writing Task on The Role of Women in Global Peace

Below are the two responses for the Academic Discussion Writing question where one of them showcases a mid-level proficiency while the other exhibits a high level of skills. Through examining the distinctions, you will acquire valuable insights into the components that lead to attaining an exceptional score in the Writing section.

Score 3 Response

I think women do play an important role in achieving global peace, but it is not the only factor. Women often bring different perspectives and skills that can help in peacebuilding. For example, they focus more on community and long-term solutions. Ruby mentioned the women-led movements in Liberia, which is a good example. However, like Harry said, peace results depend on many factors like political will and international support. It is not just about gender. Both men and women need to work together to achieve peace. So, while women are important, they are not the only key to global peace. (Word Count - 100)

Rater’s Comment

This response is adequate but lacks the depth and clarity required for a higher score. The writer agrees with both Ruby and Harry, acknowledging that women play an important role in peacebuilding but are not the sole factor. However, the argument is not well-developed, and the response lacks specific examples and detailed reasoning. The mention of the women-led movements in Liberia is a good start, but it is not elaborated upon to strengthen the argument. Additionally, the response contains grammatical errors, such as "it is not the only factor" and "like Harry said," which should be "as Harry said." These errors, while not severely impacting comprehension, do detract from the overall quality of the response. The response is also somewhat repetitive, stating that both men and women need to work together without providing additional insights or examples. Overall, the response addresses the prompt but lacks the depth, clarity, and coherence needed for a higher score.

Score 5 Response

While both Ruby and Harry make valid points, I firmly believe that women play a crucial role in achieving global peace. Women often bring unique perspectives and skills to peacebuilding efforts that can complement those of men. For instance, women are generally more focused on community welfare and long-term stability, which are essential for lasting peace. Ruby's example of the women-led movements in Liberia is a compelling case. These movements not only helped end the civil war but also laid the groundwork for sustainable peace by addressing the root causes of conflict. Additionally, involving women in peace processes ensures that the needs and voices of all community members are considered, leading to more comprehensive and inclusive solutions. While Harry is correct that peacebuilding requires a collective effort, the inclusion of women adds a valuable dimension that can enhance the effectiveness of these efforts. Therefore, I argue that women do play an indispensable role in achieving global peace. (Word count - 157 words)

Rater’s Comment

This response deserves a high score because it effectively addresses the prompt by providing a clear and well-reasoned argument. The writer acknowledges the points made by both Ruby and Harry, thereby demonstrating an understanding of the ongoing discussion. The response is well-organized, beginning with a clear stance and followed by specific reasons and examples to support the argument. The mention of the women-led movements in Liberia serves as a strong example to illustrate the unique contributions women can make to peacebuilding efforts. Additionally, the writer effectively counters Harry's point by arguing that while peacebuilding is indeed a collective effort, the inclusion of women adds a valuable dimension that enhances the overall effectiveness of these efforts. The language used is formal and appropriate for an academic discussion, and the response is free from major grammatical errors. Overall, the response is coherent, well-structured, and provides a compelling argument, making it deserving of a high score.

Strategies for Taking the Academic Discussion Writing Task 

The TOEFL Academic Discussion Writing Task may seem difficult and can cause you to become nervous. But don't feel scared! You can do this task effectively by incorporating a few vital strategies to ace your proficiency in academic writing.

• It is important to have a detailed examination of the question which is necessary to comprehend both the main idea and the setting for that specific question. It is necessary to consider the provided guidelines, such as providing a response that addresses all relevant angles.
• Finding the key arguments is made simpler by dissecting the question into its constituent parts. It's critical to successfully manage each component at the same time while organising the response.
• Before attempting to write the answer, always plan and come up with ideas and use them as examples so that you can showcase a range of perspectives.
• Making an outline ensures that the response is cohesive and the concepts are well-organized.
• Giving evidence or statistics to support assertions and points of view demonstrates your grasp of the subject.
• Avoid using any slang or informal language; instead, stick to professional language and academic terminologies, paying close attention to grammar and punctuation.

Finally, it's time for you to shine! Attempt the practice question and share your response in the comments! 

Our TOEFL experts are more than willing to provide valuable feedback which would help you achieve your target score!  Let's improve your writing skills together!

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